Yes Means No (?)

Hebrews 12 tells us in no uncertain terms that our first priority should be a life with Christ. And the key to such life is discipline. 

The chapter begins with, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.” (NLT)

One of the weights that slow us down is the word “yes.” We say “yes” when we mean “no.” Why? 

“I do not want to be mean or unhelpful.” 

“I get caught off guard.”  

“I don’t want to miss out on an opportunity.” 

And so we say “yes” when we shouldn’t—and neglect our first priority. Saying “no” should be simple, if we are to heed Jesus, Who said in Matthew 5:37, “Just say a simple, ‘Yes, I will,’ or ‘No, I won’t.’ Anything beyond this is from the evil one.” 

Prioritizing simply means saying “no” to earthly convenience that blocks our journey with and toward Jesus. Many drug users got hooked by not saying "no" to a party where marijuana and alcohol are served. After the first puff or first sip came the knell of addiction.  

Miss X, a school counselor who faces students in trouble because they couldn’t say “no” has this advise: “Don’t answer right away. Just say, ‘Let me check my schedule and get back to you. Asking for time gives you a chance to look for wise answers.”  

In the end, however, a simple, direct “no,” as Jesus said, should eliminate the expectation of any other answer and immediately frees up both the person asking and the person answering. 

But this is easier said than done, especially if we don't want to be excluded from the groups we belong to. We need the grace of self-restraint not to say “yes,” and the grace of courage to say “no.”